


The End.

by Kokisai



Series: they die [1]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Boys Kissing, Break Up, Confessions, Emotional Hurt, Flashbacks, Hurt No Comfort, I'm Going to Hell, I'm Sorry, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Instability, Oma Kokichi Needs a Hug, Pre-Game Oma Kokichi, Pre-Game Personalities (New Dangan Ronpa V3), Pre-Game Saihara Shuichi, Sad Ending, Saihara Shuichi Being an Asshole, Suicide, Trans Oma Kokichi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:28:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28853583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kokisai/pseuds/Kokisai
Summary: Ouma never got to send Saihara a text again.
Relationships: Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Series: they die [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2171178
Comments: 6
Kudos: 64





	The End.

**Author's Note:**

> its 6 am so goodnigt

The light of his room flickered, though his eyes remained glued to the ad on his phone.

_Do you long to be someone? To finally have worth? Are you tired of being pathetic, and are willing to start from the beginning?_

_How about you get your pathetic ass up and join Danganronpa, Season 53!_

_You'll be remembered. **Forever.**_

Ouma's eyes adverted from the alluring ad to look up at his desk. One of the hoodies Saihara lent him sat there, except they hadn't talked in weeks. 

Saihara had been ignoring him- or- or something. He hadn't been replying to his texts, or returning his calls like he always did. He knew Saihara saw them. They were always marked as read, or the calls were ignored _completely._ That made it hurt more.

It happened when the _Danganronpa_ auditions came out, and he hadn't spoken to Ouma since. Being at the recieving end of painful ghosting, he had already spiralled out of control. He had already been planning to end his life, only postponing it incase Saihara answered his messages.. But he didn't.

He opened the messaging app once more, scrolling up through all the messages of apologies and begging for him to respond which he had sent. It was honestly pathetic how often he did this, but he did it almost everyday, and sometimes atleast a few times a day. He scrolled and scrolled through all the messages _he_ had sent, it was pitiful. His eyes scanned over the familiar text.

**> Right, goodnight Kokichi. I love you. **

That hurt. That hurt _so, so much._ Ouma counted, he counted how many days Saihara hadn't responded back. _24 days. 3 weeks and 3 days._

He sniffled, placing his phone down. "Why?" Ouma's voice cracked. His stomach coiled, face increasingly rising in temperature while tears welled in his eyes. He whimpered, opening his mouth up to whisper. "I'm so pathetic without you, Shuichi. I don't know what I did, please, come back to me.." It was pitiful, a poor attempt to call out to any God out there, to bring his-... 

What is Saihara to him now? Saihara is ghosting him, and they were dating before, but that usually means the person wants to break up with them.

_Saihara wants to break up with him._

Ouma's whole world collapsed. He quite literally could feel his heart shattering, the aching feeling spread throughout his chest and to his head. He dug his fingers into the skin om his skull, desperately trying to tear it apart, so he could pullout his brain and squeeze every last content out of it.

_I planned to move in with him, to get married, to have kids! Then die like any old couple does!_

He paused. _I was planning our future?_  
The aching feeling throughout his chest increased, and he grabbed a pillow to scream into. It was an ear shattering scream, the pillow bearly muffling the sound of despair. He felt awful- he felt like he was going to pass out. He tore off his clothes, throwing his binder to the side and opening a window. The cold air hit his skin, giving him goosebumps. He stumbled back, and sat on the floor. Something fell off his dresser, but he didn't look.

Ouma had never planned his future. That changed with Saihara. He loved him.

The future was always iffy for him. He wasn't sure if he could afford to medically transition, or if he wanted to transition at all. It was all too expensive. To be honest, he didn't think he would live this long, but despite the times his eyes stared down the barrel of a shotgun, despite the times he held enough pills in his hands to end it all, despite how many times he just sat on the edge of the roof at school after climbing over the fence. He was still alive.

Then he remembered the ad. The _auditions._

An idea sparked in his mind, and he grabbed his phone, rereading the ad.

_To become somebody. To be remembered._

That's what he wanted. He wanted to be important, to remembered by the world. 

He wanted to get back at Saihara for ruining his life, though. Suicide would be more.. _Personal._ It was cruel, but he was mad. No, he was _furious._ Saihara knew him- he knew how much he meant to Ouma, how much Ouma loved him- yet he ignored him, no matter what he did. 

Ouma opened the messanger app again, pressing the keyboard and staring at the blank space for a moment. He furrowed his brows, and had already sent the message before he realized what it said.

**> Why are you doing this to me? I didn't do anything to you! We didn't even get into an arguement, yet you're fucking ignoring me! You're an asshole, you know that? You could've atleast broken off the relationship before ghosting me. I thought you loved me? You told me that you did. You told me that nothing woupd come between us, and that you'd never leave me. Yet here you are. How DARE YOU? I DID EVERYTHING I THOUGHT WAS RIGHT. I'M SO DONE. YOU'RE A PATHETIC PIECE OF SHIT, ND YOU ONLY LOVE YOURSELF. I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU SO GODDAMN MUCH.**

_Shit._ He didn't mean half of that, yet he let his anger get to him. He had been fuming, but now tears brimmed his eyes. Then the 3 dots appeared, and he felt his heart sink.

**> k.**

_K...?_

Tears streamed doen his face, blurring his vision while he typed the next message. He wanted to let Saihara know how much he hurt him.

**> ii really thiught youy were the one forr me, yOou dont fuckingn care, dok you,? whh y are you so cruel **

He was left on read.

☆

He stood on the chair, typing his final message to Saihara.

**> I'm sorry, Shuichi. Please don't forget about me. You might not love me anymore, but I'll always love you, okay? You still mean the world to me. Goodbye, Shumai. I hope we meet in another life.**

He had considered joining Danganronpa, but he knew he wouldn't get in. He lowered his head, the dark, oily hair obscuring his vision around himself for a moment. He pulled his head through the noose he made, and waited to see if Saihara would respond. He was a hypocrite, so he continued to send Saihara messages. More apologies. More begging.

**> That's a stupid way to say you're blocking me.**

The message he wrote was so obviously a suicide note, yet Saihara stil offered no comfort in his last moments. He sobbed. He sobbed for a long time, before dropping his phone onto a ground. It probably cracked, but he didn't care. He raised his head to look around his room again, the photos he had printed out of him and Saihara kissing, and cuddling had been torn off the walls and laid onto the bed infront of him. 

He smiled. It was a sad smile. Those were the best moments of his life. Maybe his lover didn't take his message seriously, but he knew Saihara wouls still be sad. He didn't want to hurt the boy's feelings. He went back to the moment when Saihara confessed to him. They were in Saihara's stupid backyard.

**1 + 1 = ♡**

_Saihara had been teasing Ouma, and thats when the ladder whined._

_"You don't love me!"_

_"What are you talking about? I'm in love with you."_

_They sat in silence for a while._

_Then Ouma closed his eyes, and leaned in and kissed him._

_Ouma kissed him like he wanted to be kissed, like no boy had ever kissed him, soft and moist and hot and breathy, not trying to win a battle but seeking union and closeness, the sharing of one breath, one sensation, one timeless and passionate moment. The heat rose in Ouma's cheeks when his tongue touched Saihara's tongue, quick and electric, but delicious, then firmer, more determined, more curious about the heat that lay within, seeking to chase down that elusive liquid lightning that reached through both of them._

_The taller moved ontop of Ouma, holding the shorter boy's cheeks. Ouma moved his hands up into his supple hair, entangling his fingers through it. Their lips mashed together, small hums from satisfaction left both of their mouths._

_Saihara pulled away first, but they stayed still, staring into eachothers eyes. They both wanted more, but who knew what more would lead to. That was dangerous territory, and crossing into it would lead to regrets._

_Ouma looked beautiful, his lips still damp from the kiss, the moonlight barely shining onto him, due to Saihara obscuring it. His eyes were wide, and his face had a lovely flush. This moment was perfect, everything they wanted and more._

_"Well.. I think you like me too."_

_"Yea, I do.." Their hands enterwined, and they laid in a comfortable silence._

**2 - 1 = Alone.**

Kokichi had started crying harder after reliving the memory of that, the want of Saihara growing more into a need. He needed him. He missed him so much. But he knew he couldn't, so he let himself go. He let his knees buckle. The chair slipped beneath him.

The strain on his neck knocked the air out of him, and he realized that he hadn't tied the noose good enough to break his neck. He started panicking, kicking and pulling, trying to release his restraint. His vision blurred, and he dropped his hands. Everything hurt. He couldn't breathe. He wanted help. He wanted Saihara. He wanted someone. He wanted someone to hold him again, to tell him it was okay. He couldn't have that. He never got what he wanted. What he did get was disappointment. So he let go. 

He was gone.


End file.
